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Elli Thor and his daughter, Unnur, atop an oceanside volcanic arch in Iceland. After walking away from kayaking, a newfound passion for surfing and the birth of his daughter gave Elli a new perspective worth living for.
Elli Thor and his daughter, Unnur, atop an oceanside volcanic arch in Iceland. After walking away from kayaking, a newfound passion for surfing and the birth of his daughter gave Elli a new perspective worth living for. (Photo: Chris Burkard)

This Film Will Make You Rethink Every Parental Decision

国产吃瓜黑料 photographer Chris Burkard's 'Unnur' is a gorgeous meditation on one Icelandic father's plan to raise his daughter (way, way) off the grid

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Elli Thor and his daughter, Unn煤r, atop an oceanside volcanic arch in Iceland. After walking away from kayaking, a newfound passion for surfing and the birth of his daughter gave Elli a new perspective worth living for.
(Photo: Chris Burkard)

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From the moment you become a parent, you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life second-guessing every choice you make. All of it boils down to two questions: Am I doing what I鈥檓 supposed to do to keep this kid alive? Am I giving this little person the ability to walk their own path and lead a healthy, productive, and happy life? Most parents learn to live with the decisions they make鈥攜ou have to for sanity鈥檚 sake鈥攂ut the uncertainty of it all never goes away.

Chris Burkard鈥檚new short film, Unnur, , offers a cinematic听exploration of that uncertainty, and how one parent has learned to be at peace with his unconventional choices. The 17-minute documentary follows Icelandic adventure photographer and surfer Elli Thor, a single dad raising his eight-year-old daughter, Unnur鈥攏amed after one of the Norse god of the sea鈥檚 nine daughters鈥攊n a remote A-frame cabin on the coast of Iceland, where they spend the bulk of their time on the beach. (Thor shares custody with Unnur鈥檚 mother, who鈥檚 only glimpsed in the film when he drops his daughter off at her home in town.) They鈥檙e miles away from other people by design: Thor鈥檚 plan is to share his passion for the ocean and surfing with Unnur, rather than succumb to societal expectations about how to raise his daughter.

Thor鈥檚 simply following the pattern laid out by his own parents, who never stopped doing what they loved, either. His mother was the first woman to join Iceland鈥檚 search and rescue team, and she and Thor鈥檚 fatherspent most of their time raising their own children in the country鈥檚 wild spaces. 鈥淚 think if you鈥檙eraised outdoors, even if you move away from it for a little bit of time, it鈥檚 always there. It sticks with you,鈥 Thor听says in the film. 鈥淚t was a great way to grow up.鈥

Building on that experience, he followed his own path to become a professional kayaker, taking on some of the most challenging waters in the world. Then, a decade ago, on a river in northern Iceland, he got trapped beneath a waterfall and nearly drowned, washing up half a mile downstream. After that he left kayaking and, for a time, his life outdoors, until later discovering surfing, a budding sport in his country. Still, he struggled with the question of why he survived the accident鈥攗ntil his daughter was born. Unnur鈥檚 arrival gave him a renewed sense of purpose as well as an ongoing internal dialogue as to whether or not he was doing right by her.

Burkard has been making adventure films for a long time, and you鈥檒l recognize his epic cinematography here. He shoots the rugged Icelandic coast and swells lapping up the beaches as though they鈥檙e both supporting characters, and they are. Without hitting you over the head with it in the script, Burkard鈥檚听camerawork makes clear the appeal of the land and sea and why Thor鈥檚 opted for this life.

However, Unnur represents a significant departure from Burkard鈥檚 previous work. It鈥檚 a journey into narrative storytelling, rather than what he calls the 鈥渟urf porn鈥 he鈥檚 accustomed to shooting. 鈥淚 got to know Thor a few years ago surfing in Iceland, and we became friends,鈥 Burkard听recounts. 鈥淟ater听he told me the story about almost drowning and how he still struggles with that experience as a father.鈥 It was the first time Thor had opened up about his accident to someone outside of his own family, who only found out about it when they saw it relayed on the local news.

There鈥檚 a personal element to the story that motivated Burkard, too. Growing up with a single mother, he saw her struggling to balance the challenge of raising a strong, independent kid without being held back by听the fear of the unknown, the so-called safer path. Now a father of two boys himself, Burkard, like so many of us, constantly wrestles with the question of how to responsibly raise kids without giving up our individual passions. It鈥檚听a fine line to walk. Go all in on your passion, and you could alienate听your offspring or make听them resent the things you love. Instead,听both Burkard and Thor have chosen to share their passion with their kids, even as they debate听internally with the more conventional notions of parental responsibility, such as the riskthat comes with giving kids more freedom or the struggle that can ensue when听dragging them to the beach while their peers are off to soccer games or enjoying听Xbox time.

鈥淚 want them to know that I love what I do, and I want them to love what they do, too,鈥 Burkard says. 鈥淚 made this as an advocacy piece for parents.鈥

Unnur is a quiet film. There鈥檚 not a lot of dialog, and it doesn鈥檛 really need it. Thor and Unnur, who we don鈥檛 hear from much at all, don鈥檛 have to say much for the audience to see the deep level of trust and affection the two share. Burkard鈥檚 lens captures those sentiments nicely in Thor鈥檚 world-weary expressions and the wonder in his daughter鈥檚 face as she stares out at the ocean.


Thor lives and breathes听the ocean鈥攊t鈥檚 what gave him a second chance at life鈥攂ut he鈥檚 not forcing Unnur into a career as a professional surfer like some obnoxious Little League parent yelling at their kid from the bleachers because they鈥檙e not throwing the perfect curveball at ten听years old. In fact, you only see her on a board once in the film. The two while听away most of their time playing on the beach, splashing in the waves, or collecting shells and feathers. Sometimes she watches him or does her own thing while he surfs.

And though his parenting approach is one of the more extreme examples of living a life outdoors, it鈥檚 applicable to anyone with their own brood. All parents balance the risk and responsibility that come听with raising kids, but we don鈥檛 have to stop doing what we love when children arrive. Even if your adventures become limited to weekend peak bagging or a backcountry canoe trip,听you can still take your little ones with you.

鈥淟ike my parents did, I share my passion with her in hopes that she鈥檒l grow the courage to do life鈥檚 hardest thing, to choose her own path, not the one society chooses for her,鈥 Thor explains. 鈥淚f I can do that, I鈥檒l go to the grave a happy man.鈥

The most difficult part of parenting is that we never really get a definitive answer as to whether what听we鈥檙e doing is working, if we鈥檙e听successfully straddling听the line between risk and responsibility. You just have to accept the constant uncertainty of the dilemma听and proceed.

鈥淚 don鈥檛 know if I鈥檓 doing right,鈥 Thor says,听鈥渙r if I鈥檒l ever know, but the most important thing is that we鈥檙e doing it together.鈥

In the final scene of Unnur, Thor carries his daughter into the house and puts her to bed at the end of a long day at the beach. As he says goodnight, she whispers her only line in the film: 鈥淐an we go surfing again tomorrow?鈥

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