In late 2008, faced a major life decision: Was she going to keep up with her increasingly famous rock-climbing son, Alex Honnold, by getting听a foothold into his risk-taking world, or was she going to lose him to the mountains?
She knew that scaling sheer rock faces with his willpower and wits was what her son did well. She鈥檇 seen his image in so many magazines following his climbs, including his free solos of such exotically named walls as in Zion National Park,听as well as both and 听in Yosemite.
But when he returned from yet another successful expedition someplace in the world, she couldn鈥檛 relate to his stories. 鈥淚t was like another language,鈥 said Wolownick, a writer and career foreign-language professor who lives near Sacramento, California. 鈥淎nd like I am when I鈥檓 confronted with any new language, I want to learn it. So that when he came home, I鈥檇 know enough to both celebrate the victories and commiserate with the defeats听and just be a part of his life.鈥
A decade later, she鈥檚 shown that if she hasn鈥檛 completely mastered the nuanced phraseology of rock climbing, she鈥檚 pretty darn听proficient. Last year, at age 66, Wolownick became the oldest woman to ascend Yosemite鈥檚 iconic El Capitan. She has also emerged as a survivor who overcame the emotional damage of a dysfunctional marriage, a dedicated mother who raised two kids with extraordinary athletic skill sets: Alex the rock climber听and , a runner and cyclist who has passed her passion for both sports on to her mother.
Last year, at age 66, Wolownick became the oldest woman to ascend Yosemite鈥檚 iconic El Capitan.
Even in retirement, Wolownick regularly runs regional road races and cycles whenever her schedule permits. But for the most part, whenever she finds a free moment in good weather, she heads for the nearest crag for yet another rock climb.
This month, Wolownick published , a memoir about her metamorphosis from a self-effacing wife in an unhappy marriage to a confident athletic role model for her generation.听
To say the book is solely a chronicle of rock climbing is like claiming is all about riding Harleys. It鈥檚 a mother鈥檚 tale of late-life role reversal, how she opened herself up to learn important lessons from her grown children. 鈥淭he book is about being able,鈥 she says. 鈥淚t鈥檚 about not listening to the naysayers and listening to your heart instead. That鈥檚 how you achieve stuff. I was raised in the other extreme, taught to shut up and be obedient. Girls just didn鈥檛 do certain things.鈥
Wolownick describes her years of coping with the antics of her resilient son, who听she recalls reached age four probably thinking his name was 鈥淎lexander鈥擭o!鈥 He regularly clambered to the top of kitchen appliances and various playground equipment.
鈥淎lex, don鈥檛 go up there,鈥 she鈥檇 say.
鈥淲hy, Mom?鈥 he鈥檇 answer. 鈥淚t鈥檚 really easy.鈥
Daughter Stasia, two years older, was always the 鈥渄iplomat鈥 who seemed to know intuitively when Alex had pushed his mother too far. She鈥檇 take his hand, Wolownick writes, 鈥渁nd gently lead him away from the scene. Somehow, she always knew.鈥
Her memoir also chronicles the demise of her marriage to Charles Honnold, whose unexplained anger and brooding emotional distance she now believes were the result of Asperger鈥檚 syndrome. She likens tiny cracks that began to emerge in her marriage to being 鈥渓ike the hairline webs that cover the bottom of your great-grandmother鈥檚 soup tureen or sugar bowl, but that don鈥檛 stop you from using it.鈥 Following her eventual divorce and Charles鈥檚 death from a heart attack in 2004, Wolownick focused her attention on her two college-aged听children, who in return propelled their mother to find a new inner strength.

Stasia became a one-woman cheering section after the divorce听and later turned Wolownick on to the world of jogging, then running, and eventually marathons, which she soon found 鈥渃ontagious.鈥 Alex did his part, too. When Wolownick came home announcing with pride that she鈥檇 just run a mile, he听took听a nonchalant bite of a cookie and shrugged. 鈥淐ool,鈥 he said. 鈥淚f you can do one, then you can do one and a half.鈥
Alex later introduced his mother to the vertical pursuit of rock climbing at the gym. 鈥淚 was 34 years older than my son, who was already an adult; he was babysitting me,鈥 she writes. 鈥淢y chicken arms were weak, my body was flabby, and I knew I must look silly and awkward to him as I struggled up the artifice wall. But those thoughts fell away in a few seconds.鈥
In raising Alex, she learned how to forge her own path and trust her own judgment听rather than following well-meaning advice about the norms of parenting, because those norms didn鈥檛 apply to her son. One friend and mother of a small boy suggested Wolownick听put Alex on medication, advice she听dismissed out of hand. When friends visited her home and saw him doing something dangerous,听Wolownick would see them leap to their feet and yell at Alex, 鈥淲atch out!鈥 Still, she kept making the coffee, believing that Alex would not push his limits.
In her memoir, Wolownick details her ascent of El Capitan and the newfound ability to enter 鈥渢he zone鈥 that allowed her reach the top. In the past, she鈥檇 only reached that zen state while painting, running, and playing the piano.
She also tackles a comment she often hears regarding her relationship with her famous rock-scaling son: 鈥淗ow would you like to be that kid鈥檚 mother?鈥 鈥淚 trust his judgment. It has to come down to that,鈥 she says. 鈥淗e鈥檚 the only one capable of knowing if he can do a climb. And no matter what I or anyone else says, he鈥檚 going to do it anyway.鈥澨
Wolownick intends this as a book for everyone鈥攔etirees, parents,听and rock climbers alike. But I鈥檓 not a parent and I don鈥檛 climb, so I was less interested in the details of summiting any face or dealing with a precocious听yet gifted child. Where the book gripped me best were the parts where Wolownick fights her way through an emotionally abusive marriage to find a place to breathe, as both a woman and mother. The challenges she overcame seem to me as challenging as any rock wall.
These days, Wolownick is at home recovering from foot-reconstruction surgery to repair a chronic condition. But she鈥檚 impatient. With the publication of her new memoir, there are book signings waiting in the wings. There are also roads to be run and听rock walls to be climbed鈥攁 return to a听demanding athletic life that her own two children have taught her to cherish.